It's Friday-- A Whole New Meaning

I start tonight and I am feeling so many emotions. Of course, I feel anxious about the mundane thoughts of Will my boss let me off early to get to the studio with ample time? Will yogurt be okay to eat before tonight? Should I wear yoga clothes tonight? I should have tried harder to get a refill on my inhaler earlier this week...
Then I think of deeper questions. Will I make connections with the people I share my training with? Will they want to make connections with me? Will my body be able to do what I need it to do? Will this matter? It matters to me.
As humans we are afraid of the unknown and this is relatively new territory for me.
Among all these questions and scattered thoughts, I am very excited. I find every now and then I yearn for a big change. Every time I have embraced change, it has pushed me out of my comfort zone but allowed me to find deeper happiness.
I have many hopes going into this program but I know that much of what happens is up to me. This is the type of program where I am in control and it's scary. I'm excited.

Someday I Will Be Able to Do This

If you've followed my blog for a while you know that the one ritual I have is my morning yoga. While my morning practice is not as advanced as this, I do hope to someday make it such. To be able to awaken every part of my body and be completely ready for the day is ideal.
Mornings Krista Marie Starr -Yoga Teacher

Amrit, Not-it Yoga

Amrit yoga was not what I expected at all. I figured it would be spiritual with strong focus on breath during poses but the entire class I went to was centered on breath, and connecting with your seventh chakra. While that sounds kind of cool, it was very frustrating at the end when I have so much energy build up to spend. I wanted to use my energy, relieve myself of tension and while the instructor meant well, sometimes just breathing isn't enough. It's great for people who have long work days and are stressed but this is at a college campus where there is stress and students do get tired but not the extent of a full-scheduled mother or anything like that. The day I went was a very blah day thanks to the icky rainy weather and I just bummed around the apartment watching movies all day, caught up with my shows. I needed to use that energy build up but unfortunately Amrit Yoga is not meant for that.
At least now I know. I gave it an honest attempt and respected the instructor's styles but it's just not for me. I need my Vinyasa; I need to feel my muscles shake while sweat drips down... I need my power yoga back. I'm still hunting and to be honest I'm still trying to get myself back into good habits. I've just been so busy in the mind and now I feel icky because my period... I need to push past these excuses. I will keep you posted.

Namaste.

Hello There, World

It's been quite some time since my last post. I've allowed myself to be engulfed in Vampire Diaries via Netflix, along with a few other shows available to me through Xfinity. While I do indeed enjoy these shows, I look up from this screen and I see my tea untouched, my homework piled, my other half immersed in Dr. Who or Minecraft. I see the world that we, as people, seem to make into a medium rather than the actual fruit of our lives. We walk to class, the library; we go on a trip to Disney World, but are we really there 100%? How much of our lives do we spend on Facebook or watching marathons of shows and movies?
Let me say it again, there is nothing wrong with enjoying your favorite show or movie but what happens when we delve so deep that we wake up wondering whether we're finally going to find out exactly how Elena Gilbert becomes a vampire instead of wondering if it'll rain today-- or even what we will do to fill in the time between what absolutely needs to be done?
I am guilty of allowing myself to fall down a self-made rabbit whole of obsession. I've kept up well enough with my homework and yoga but I haven't breathed life into my work or loved habits... they simply were routine.
So. This is me admitting to the world this obsession.
This is also me apologizing to myself. Life is short and by dedicating far too many hours to the computer screen, I've missed out-- or, at least, potentially missed out. I may not have missed out one week but when I finally come up for air from this obsession, I see responsibilities that need to be cared for. They could have been cared for earlier to keep room open for new experiences but instead they were spent ogling Damon Salvatore. I don't want to miss out. I don't want to live through a television show. I want to breathe fresh air and meet new people, make mistakes, and feel everything that comes along with the experiences.
I need to work on moderation. Moderation with television shows as well as sweets. Two birds with one stone.
So here's to more time spent on assignments and projects, trying new recipes, reading, writing blog posts, taking pictures, exercising, and spending quality time with Alex. I wish you all the same and best.

Namaste.

My Body Is A Playground For Rinpoche

My little angel has finally joined us in our new home and, at first, I was very heart-broken because I was worried he would never adjust. He was so skittish, never wanted to come out from under the bed, and barely presented the opportunity to hold him. But now he's getting out more (even though we have to lock in out of the bedroom to make sure that he puts an attempt at being social) and is even getting involved with my morning yoga!
Upon peeking around the corner, out to the living room where I was doing my morning practice, sweet Rinpoche raced to me to rub his fuzzy wittle self on my face while in down-dog (a-choo). Apparently, my body is a playground for him and my practice is all the better for it. Instead of stepping up to forward fold from my down-dog, I decided to do another vinyasa with consideration to the little bundle of love laying on my mat just below my stomach. Excellent form. My limbs were strong and unshaken, knowing that I would squish the poor thing if I was at all lazy. With no care for my perfectly safe movements above him, Rinpoche moved off the mat in search for another way to be adorably distracting.
Oh, little Rinpoche. <3

Drop the Bags

From YogaLouStudios' Pinterest

My yoga practice has been doing well. It's the first thing I do when I wake up-- second, actually, to feeding Mr. Turtle and watering my plants. I've started attending a yoga class again and I'm happy to say I found another wonderful instructor. Kristen's class at the USF Rec Center is mostly driven by the requests of students but the compilation works almost seamlessly. If you know me personally, you probably know that the physical aspect of yoga isn't enough. For me, it goes into one's self and helps you breathe in the life around you.
Each yoga instructor has their own philosophy about what yoga does for the body and mind and it becomes more clear each time you attend their class. You can tell by the words they choose and the sorts of encouragement they provide. Kristen's phrase is one that really solidified my liking for her style; whenever we exhale, she says "Let anything go that does not serve you."  She tells us to be in the moment and enjoy it knowing that there is no where else but on our mat that we need to be. Letting go is difficult for many people, but when numerous things pile up that provide nothing but negative feelings, I'm the first to drop it and breathe. Why hold onto something if it causes you nothing but stress? In the practice, you have to let go of all that baggage because it shows through the practice; it holds you back. It may not hold you back physically, you could very well be doing strong hand stands, but you will feel shaky inside if you are thinking about financial troubles on your mat.
I've found it improves my own practice to just let it all go, if only for a little while. That's one thing about baggage-- it's always waiting right where you left it.

Side Effects of Yoga

When I first began practicing yoga, I did it to improve my airflow. As an asthmatic, breathing is always a concern. Now that I am moving up and beyond mindful breathing, I'm happy to say that my determination is acting as a suggestion to others, provoking thought. I had told my best friend back home that I'm waking up at 7 am every day to do yoga. A couple days after I started-- and opened up this blog-- she set down her mat and is doing it now, too. She had been sick with the flu all last week and two days into her morning yoga routines, she's breathing and feeling better.

Beyond the obvious benefits of sculpting and balance, yoga provides benefits even beyond that of mindful breathing; it provides benefits of the mind. Yoga can bring a sense of peace and a centering. It physically helps rid of the stress that your mind or workload has burdened upon your body.

The more challenging the pose, the more I want to succeed. It's important to know how far to push, however. Take each progression in your practice at your own pace to avoid injuries. Whenever I'm in a pose and I know I can do a little more, I do. My muscles may quiver and my mind may scream for the next pose but I keep on. With every exhale, I push out the doubt and allow strength in. These are moments when I am so focused on the pose, all my troubles and conflicts slip away. The space that is left is filled with determination to hold that pose-- to be in complete control of my body in that very moment.
Then there are other moments when I'm getting into corpse pose and I feel it all come back. It's not an attack of stress, just a mere gentle confrontation. They are put before me once more and then with an exhale, they are gone. All that is left is me as I let them go, just as I release my limbs to submit to this pose of rest.

Sunday's workout was morning yoga, then Power Yoga in the afternoon (90 minutes of Vinyasa Yoga: movement paired with breath).